One Step Closer
by darklight182
Summary: She had no idea at how she had ended up there. It had most certainly not been her intention. Maybe it was someone above that was bored and was passing time by messing with her? Whatever it was it wasn't funny.(Contains themes some may find triggering.)


**Disclaimer: I do not own anything that has to do with Hakuouki in any way. I do however own the OC.**

**Warning: This story has heavy implication of suicide and suicidal themes throughout. I want you to know this before you continue to read further in case there any of you who are sensitive to these kind of themes. **

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><p>Had she finally succeeded?<p>

The pain was still there. It wasn't as strong as before but it was still there.

She could still hear voices around her. They were faded but still close enough so that she could catch some of the words that were spoken between them. It was almost as if she were in a completely different space than them but yet was. She could hear them but they were unaware of her woken presence there.

_"I found her like this..."_

_"You think someone did this to her?"_

_"There was nobody else there."_

_"You think she did this...?"_

It were two voices. One man and one woman. The fear in their voices was clear for anyone to hear. She opened her eyes hesitantly and quickly closed them as a dim light greeted them. Cursing inwards, she did not bother to open them again as she realized what had occurred. Bitter disappointment washed over her as the realization of the situation hit her.

She had been found. They had found her in time.

_"Miss?"_

A new voice called out to her and she was saddened at the youthfulness it possessed. It had to be a young boy from the sound of it. Had he seen the severity of her injuries? She hoped not. If anything else for his own sake. What were they thinking letting a child watch as they took care of her?

_"Kirei. Don't bother her."_

She heard how the woman scolded the young boy, an harshness lacing her words that did not match well together with the softness of her voice. Thoughts were racing through her mind as her memories of the past events leading up to this moment slowly returned to her. Her memories of what she had done was still vague but a few details stood out to her.

_She had been alone in her apartment. Her depression had finally gotten the best out of her and she had allowed herself to be swallowed up whole by it. All of her emotions - the seething sadness, anger, and self-hate - had slowly but surely taken control of her and she had been powerless to resist the onslaught that soon followed suit. She did not remember how the knife had ended up in her hand - that detail did not really matter that much to her - but she did remember the sensation as it had touched her skin. _

_She had never been fond of pain. She had never reveled in it. But in that moment it had been the only thing she knew and yet she hadn't stopped. In that moment the pain had been her only ally and she had been all too willing to submit to it. Everything around her had seemed pointless and, to put it nicely, trivial as she had lost herself within the embrace of her one ally._

_And this time, if she was lucky, she hoped she would never resurface from it again. _

She struck away the remainder of that memory. It was too painful for her to even think about, especially considering how it all had played out in the end. She had failed. She had taken so many actions to make sure so that she would succeed this time but she had still failed.

_"Yoshie. Could you take Kirei and get for me. He should get to look at these wounds just to be safe."_

_" Where am I?"_

From the words she had heard so far it was safe to say that she wasn't at a hospital as she had previously thought. Opening her eyes, she noticed a woman sitting next to her. The woman seemed unaware of the fact that she was currently awake as her attention seemed to be focused on her arms. Or more, precisely her wounds.

"_What-What is she doing?"_

Her mind was still in a daze as she tried to focus. Her eyes moved to the woman's face and lingered there, trying to read the expression that it wore. Was it worry or fear that she saw there?

"Please let them be..."

Her voice was meek as she uttered her request. She would have normally wanted to kick herself for allowing herself to get caught up like this but at this point she felt so weak that she was surprised that she could even bring herself to speak properly.

A surprised gasp left the woman as she heard her. The woman was young. Probably a bit older than her but she still seemed to be in her earlier twenties. Her long dark hair fell loosely down her shoulders and from the bags beneath her eyes it was easy to see that she had had a tough night.

The woman's eyes glistened with relief as she applied pressure to the lacerations on her wrists. A hiss left her as she felt how the cloth the woman used brushed against the afflicted area of her skin, making it burn unpleasantly. A curse left her and she could see how a look of surprise moved across the woman's features before a calming smile would cross her lips.

"There, there. I'm just about done with taking care of your wounds."

"Where am I?"

She asked as her eyes darted across the room. The room was dimly lit by a few candles and from what she could make out she could see that they seemed to be the only people in there. The man and boy must have left them then.

"You're in the outskirts of Kyoto. My husband found you on his way home."

Her eyebrows furrowed together in confusion as she tried to sit up. This proved to be a bad call as she felt how dizziness quickly set in. The woman must have noticed this as she quickly placed her hands on her shoulders and gently pushed her back into the bedding.

"Please be careful. You don't want to reopen your wounds again, do you?"

"Do you think you could repeat that? That part of where I am?"

The woman stared at her with apparent confusion in her eyes but did agree to her request . She must have heard the fear that had been embedded in her voice because her voice wavered somewhat as she answered.

"As I said you're in Kyoto. Um...How does your memory fare?"

So she hadn't misheard her.

The woman's eyes softened as she noticed the look of confusion that had etched itself on her features.

"My name is Himura Yuuko. What's yours?"

Her name?

"My name is Tara."

The woman hummed slightly in response as the smile on her face brightened somewhat.

"Are you a westerner?"

She blinked. The woman must have misunderstood her reaction as a slight blush soon colored her cheeks.

"I'm sorry. It's just that you don't really look like you're from this country..." The other woman hurriedly said and her voice soon trailed off. A moment of awkward silence was shared between the two of them before she opened her mouth to respond.

"It's fine. Don't worry about it."

This had to be some seriously messed up dream she was having. Or maybe she was having a dying hallucination of some kind. Was she still actually in her apartment?

Before she could bring herself to say something more, the sound of steps could be heard coming from outside the room. Soon the door to the room slid open and revealed the sight of two men and a young boy. One of the men entered the room, while the other and the child remained standing at the opening. The boy hid behind the man legs as he glanced into the room. That had to be the man and boy that had been previously in the room. What had their names been, again?

"I'm sorry if we took some time. So I guess this was the girl you spoke of?"

The man gave her a small smile before he bent down next to her and studied her arms. She studied the man as she waited for him to get done with his inspection. He was bald and had a kind set of eyes that seemed to regard her with concern.

His movements were precise as he moved to study the severity of her wounds and within a few minutes moved back, apparently satisfied.

"I see you took care of her quite well." he turned to face the woman who sat at the opposite side of him and gave her a approving nod. She smiled back with apparent gratitude at his words.

"You should be careful with how you move from now on for a while. The stitches are well done but if you're not careful they may be undone. You will have to have them re-stitched then. Be careful to keep them clean as well," the man looked down at her as he spoke and she did not miss the severe undertone behind his words. As a good little patient, she nodded eagerly to show that she had understood.

"Now then. Do you have any family in the area? They should know that's you're here." The doctor spoke gently to her. Tara felt as if the air in her lungs disappeared from her as she heard what he had said.

"I..I have my parents. But I don't want them to know about this," she answered. The man looked at her for a moment before he sighed before shaking his head.

"She can stay here for the night," Tara glanced at Yuuko as she heard her words. Although relieved at the woman's kindness, a part of her did not want to stay there for any longer than she needed to. It wasn't that she didn't appreciate her offer. She did. But something within her told her that she had to leave, to place as much distance as she possibly could from the house and be alone. It was an irrational thought. One that did not make a lot of sense but yet in her mind it did.

She doubted that they would let her leave though. At least willingly so. She would have to appease them first.

"I'm grateful. I really am. But all I need to do is to get back to my apartment. I have my cell phone there. I can call my parents from there... " The lie left her smoothly and she was almost surprised at the tone of sincerity she had managed to sustain as the words left her. She had no intentional of letting her parents know of what she had done. It would remain as her own little secret.

Upon ending her sentence she could feel everyone staring at her.

"W-What?"

"Maybe she took a hit to the head as well?"

She could hear the man from the door entrance mutter quietly under his breath and she resisted the urge to turn her head to glare at him. Everyone else seemed to regard her with confusion and she felt herself shrink in embarrassment.

Yuuko was the first one to react.

"Well. I for one would feel a lot better knowing that you're not alone traveling outside in your state. There are so many things that can happen to a lone woman at night."

Before she could bring herself to object, the doctor intervened.

"Well. I guess that's solved then." the doctor said as he got up on his feet. Yuuko followed his actions and once up on her feet, gave him a small bow of her head.

"Thank you for coming at such an late hour, ."

"If there are any further complications then please do not hesitate to come and get me."

"We will. Yoshie, could you follow the good doctor home?"

"Fine. Let's go, doctor."

It took a moment for the sounds of their steps to disappear. Yuuko approached the child that was still standing at the door and bent in front of him.

"Kirei. Do you think you could be a good boy and get me my futon? I will sleep here tonight."

"Is the lady okay?"

"Yes. Now please do what I asked."

It didn't take long before the boy returned with the asked item. He was rewarded with a warm smile for his efforts.

"Now get to bed. Kirei. We're going to have a long day tomorrow. .."

Closing her eyes, she tried to ignore the hushed voices around her as she felt herself slowly slipping away into unconsciousness. The entirety of her entire being wished that when she woke up, she would see the familiar dull white ceiling of her bedroom. Although she knew within herself that this had to be a dream, a small part of her doubted this.

_"Please god, let this be a dream."_


End file.
